so getting into grad school doesn�t look like its going to work out after all... it turns out that even tho their webpages give evidence to the contrary, for most colleges you must have an undergrad degree in music before you can be accepted to grad school. or at least thats what they tell an aspiring musician whose experience lies almost solely in rock music. i did have one school that would have let me in but my compositions weren�t good enough. This didn�t really come as a surprise to me after i looked at the grad school curriculum and saw how advanced it was and that it didn�t cover (even in recap) all the stuff you learn in undergrad. so somehow i�m going to see if i can make this work even tho i�ll have to go to undergrad. financial and time planning just got harder. i�m disappointed that it looks like its going to be harder than i thought, but i had the feeling this might be the case.
in other news, i�ve been meaning to put my songs on a different website cuz i learned you have to have an account to listen to my stuff on my previous website. (I know i probably should have tested that sooner. I too hate when you have to sign up for something when u just want to listen to one little thing). but anyway i found a better site, and as best as i can tell, you do not have to sign up to listen. see the link to the left if you want to listen to some of my music. i added one of my instrumental jams i did w/ a friend in college. he said i could do w/ it what i want. lots of my friends have it so i probably won�t leave it up for all that long, cuz i�m still somewhat paranoid about being found out. I'd like to put up more of my music done w/ others but for all the others i wouldn't feel right about it unless i attached their names along w/ it
i started reading the bk �reflections on life after life� by Raymond A. Moody Jr M.D. I may buy the original �life after life� since the reflections is more of a companion extension of this bk. i never really looked into life after death stories myself; i�d always just heard about them. the bk definitely is interesting and is freaking me out. i�d like to research its validity more but for now am enjoying reading it. basically a dr goes about interviewing people w/ life after death experiences and listing all their similarities, and they are very striking similarities. overall it gives a comforting feeling about the afterlife, altho there are a couple more uncommon experiences that seem a little undesirable. its very intriguing stuff and i�m wondering why i didn�t look into it earlier and why its not more mainstream. perhaps its becuz in my earlier days i felt i already had all the answers (thru Christianity) and these somewhat contradictory stories would only weaken/confuse my faith. altho the previous lack of this type of thing being published adds validity to its claims, in that how could all of these people just happened to dream all of this up and it be so similar. its also given me a different perspective on my life, or brought me back to a different perspective. i used to be obsessed w/ the afterlife and securing my place in Heaven. i was scared to death of Hell and had nightmares about it. its weird to think about spirits and deceased relatives being able to observe you. that stuff has always freaked me out and i�ve just avoided thinking about it. but this book seems reliable enough for me to read what it has to say, and it does mention this some. to me, thinking about life after death makes this life seem that much more amazing.
8:58 p.m. - 2006-06-25
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honesty was a luxury and now i think i'm broke - 2015-04-09
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