where was i... oh yes, summarizing where i am. i'll try to give you a brief history of my life. not to different than most guys my age living in america. i grew up with one sister and was lucky enough to have parents that never divorced. some of the earliest memories i have are times when i freaked myself out by thinking about the reality of my situation. the first thing that freaked me out was that i was a real person, having my own life, like so many others had done. you wouldn't think this would freak me out but it did. I guess its that point where you realize you are not the universe you share it equally with everyone else. I was always a little shy in school. My parents were friends with the parents of some other kids who ended up being in the incrowd as soon as there was an incrowd and so i was friends with them when i was young and in this manner got in the incrowd. its interesting looking back and realizing how much things could be different if certain coincidents hadn't happened. anyway, i'll jump to middle school. by this time t.v. and radio and my other peers also affected by these and other devices had begun to turn me from my own person into a selfconscience person seeking pride above all else, wanting to be cool. Its interesting how usually when we get what we want its a bad thing (i've been confused about a lot of things lately so a lot of what i'm saying i don't say with 100% confidence). I had some good friends in middle school but a lot of it was bad, just people getting together trying to be cool together. I think the best friends i've had over the years are the friends that i was reluctant to be friends with because of their social status at school. i know that sounds bad, but i was there friend anyway, and everytime i did it, it seemed like the more of a risk i took that much more their friendship ended up meaning to me.
i'm getting kind of bored of writing this, i think i'll write it in sections.
11:45 p.m. - 2002-04-13
Recent entries:
honesty was a luxury and now i think i'm broke - 2015-04-09
left vs right brain - 2014-05-17
one day at a time - 2013-09-20
compulsive internet surfing - 2013-04-14
ski trip - 2013-02-08
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