i�m pretty exhausted. have been pretty much all week. we finally had a winter storm last week and I got to go skiing at my favorite resort and it was some of the best conditions i�ve skied in. it was a lot of fun and i wore myself out that day but it was definitely worth it.
work continues to be difficult and test by ability to think that life is worth living. life seriously feels almost like torture right now. anybody else out there interested in starting / joining a commune or something? again i ask myself, why do we do it? why do we work ourselves so much? i am ready to compromise and get away from pure capitalism. i would happily have a cell phone that doesn�t work quite as well, a computer that doesn�t compute quite as fast, etc. or no cell phone or computer at all for that matter if it meant my quality of life went up. does anybody out there enjoy spending the majority of their time and energy at work? i would be willing to cut my income in half and work part time if they�d let me and i didn�t plan to leave my job anyway. so yea, looks like my job is not a good fit for me... i just hope there�s one out there that is.
sorry to talk about work so much....
i thought i would talk a little bit about my experience w/ the unitarian church over the past yr or so.
the people are really cool. the friends i have from that church are the type of friends that i�ve always wanted to have, and did have to some degree in college. they have such a zeal for life. they�re so involved and it seems like they have way more time than me to do all those things. they have a lot of energy. the congregation as a whole is very open and honest. they seem so genuine. its a fairly small congregation. they have �joys and concerns� where people talk about whats going on in their lives. in a lot of ways its a very close supportive community. most people there are very knowledgeable (or the ones i�ve run across anyway). when i point out a cool thing i heard on npr they usually already knew about it and tell me lots more i didn�t know. last night the young adult group got together and had dinner at one of their places. we just talked, ate, and talked. and it was very fascinating conversation.
from a theology pt of view the pastor seems very aware of the monumental overwhelming task of trying to make sense of it all, but at the same time believing that some things are more desirable than others and they are very passionate about their causes. i�ve learned more about other cultures and other religions since i�ve attended there. on a lot of issues my thoughts are in line with theirs. one of those being that what makes us different, for the most part, is our environment, and we should try and understand others� points of view. i�m also much less awkward / afraid of gay people now. at first i was kind of freaked out about meeting gay people and in the past i had had friends who turned out to be gay and it kind of freaked me out. but now its just starting to seem more normal. i certainly don�t understand it; it seems very strange, but i can appreciate that they�re still people just like me trying to do the best they can. and they face soo many challenges. it would be so incredibly hard to be gay. it seems to be the one main thing that people are allowed to discriminate against. they can deny you housing or a job based on you being gay. not to mention the way they�re shunned and told that they�re going to hell. the alienation that i mentioned from my friends and family due to my religion would be even worse for someone when they come out and tell people they�re gay. there was a lady in our congregation who told us that her family just found out she was gay (i think she was in her late 30�s). they told her that they couldn�t be her parents anymore and she burst into tears. You could feel her pain and it seemed as infinite as the mind can imagine.
as cool as the UU church is in a lot of ways, it hasn�t been giving me what i want out of a church lately... they have to be so careful not to offend anyone that they can�t really worship anything. i am still very much a theist and i miss the worship and acknowledgment of God. i�ve been raised in that and now that i�ve gone so long w/ out it it seems like something is missing. i need to find a theist UU type of church but so far i�ve been unsuccessful. my other dislike with the church is how political they are. every now and then they have a sermon that makes me think i�m at a democratic party meeting and not a church. that bugged me about Christian churches and it bugs me about the UU church. i really dislike the polarizing attitude of your completely stupid and we�re right. i also dislike the inability to understand that religious views and political views are not one and the same. you can have the same religious views and different political views and vice versa.
overall, my experiences at the UU church have been very positive and i recommend it to anyone who is searching for answers.
on a completely different note, I ran across this and found it interesting:
Scientific American: Hearing Colors, Tasting Shapes [ NEUROSCIENCE ]
You ever heard of synesthesia, where people's senses blend together?
9:01 p.m. - 2006-02-19
Recent entries:
honesty was a luxury and now i think i'm broke - 2015-04-09
left vs right brain - 2014-05-17
one day at a time - 2013-09-20
compulsive internet surfing - 2013-04-14
ski trip - 2013-02-08
My profile
Archives
Notes
Diaryland
Random
RSS
others:
kenny-loo
bliss-sad
duplicitous
lost-facade
realthoughts
perceptions