There are a lot of things I like about the school I�m attending right now. One of them is that once you pay your health fee upfront you get free dr visits, physical therapy, and counseling� it sounds too good to be true but so far so good. So I decided to once again try to get help w/ my neck problem. I�ve gone to a physical therapist before but I figured since these work w/ so many musicians maybe they�ll be able to help, since my problem is so aggravated by playing guitar.. this time I mentioned the neck twitching problem I have� which I really hate to talk about in here because it makes me feel like such a loser� but I need to be honest in here for this journal to be of any benefit to me� so yea, told them about my problem, and everybody else in the room who was eavesdropping (which was one big open room rather than separate offices)� eventually I told them I was thinking about seeing the counselor about it too because I think there is a physical and a mental aspect to it. So, I had my first visit with a psychiatrist. I am rather good at spilling my guts to a complete stranger (perhaps partly because of my experience with this journal), and it felt really good to have someone there to respond, show sympathy, and offer some helpful feedback. I think this counselor is a good match for me. Maybe I need closer friends because as I was telling her all this stuff I thought about how I�d never really discussed some of this with another person before� anyway, I�m rambling, sorry. In conclusion, I�m happy about this and am fairly hopeful that it will help in some way.
Other than this, my life has been rather boring lately. I finished my first piece for a full orchestra and had the school orchestra rehearse it. So that was pretty cool� I�ve just been working too hard at school. Its just not worth it. I�m 26, I need to focus on making my life better and not on getting all A�s and impressing the deans. i mean, its important but I need to balance it out better.
I need a better way to met girls. Nearly all the girls in my classes are engaged or married. And I just don�t like the bar scene at all; I feel like a fish out of water.
Spring break started this weekend. Happy about that. I watched eternal sunshine in a spotless mind tonight and liked it. I don�t watch much tv/movies anymore, but this allows me to only watch stuff that�s highly recommended, which is nice. So yea, I thought the movie had a nice feel / emotion / meaning behind it. We learn from our mistakes, and our memories, even when they are painful, are part of us and should stay part of us. I used to say that I wished I�d never met the girl that caused me such heartache. But this movie helped me realize that I learned from it, and that, even though we were not meant to be, we did have some enjoyable moments that its ok for me to look back on fondly.
Sorry for the long no-update.
12:20 a.m. - 2008-03-17
Recent entries:
honesty was a luxury and now i think i'm broke - 2015-04-09
left vs right brain - 2014-05-17
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